Nintendo Wii Game

Wii (pronounced urine) (or Nintendo Wang in Japanese) is the name of Nintendo's newest console with a MSRP of at Least 100 dollars. The idea was born by Japanophiles who thought the phrase "Wii will change everything" was the funniest thing ever. Nintendo claims the "ii" is an image of gamers playing together... which is complete crap as gamers have no friends with whom to play. The Wii fan base consists mainly of soccer moms, 5-year-old girls, and whiny 12 year olds whose parents can't afford a decent gaming console. Anyone with half a brain knows that it's basically just the FailCube with vibrator/Wiimote capabilities and next-gen freezing technology. It is also 99.9% likely that it will give you wanker's cramp.

With the Wii's cutting edge waggle technology, you can expect nothing but the most mind blowingly, kick ass, new, and more than anything, innovative games ever made in the history of the universe. Have you ever played chess before? Fuck no, you haven't played chess until you've played Wii Chess! Unlike regular old boring chess where you move un-animated chess pieces across a boring wooden board using your fucking monkey hands, Wii Chess allows you to manipulate virtual chess pieces using cutting edge motion-sensor technology, allowing you to proudly shout "check mate!" at your opponent over the interwebs like any civilized 21st century gamer.